Wednesday, June 04, 2008

No where to let it out so decided to just talk to my blog...

I am lost...i admit i am uselessly weak~i know my ex bf was not good to me but have been dragging on for a torturous 1 year until lately i just want to put a stop to all these because i just could not take it anymore. If i were to stay on with him is for all the wrong reasons coz i know hes not the one i want. I grew dependent on him and he's like a shelter to me when i have problem i will run to him though he never cared what has happened. I thought i was coping it well but probably not...and the reason is not because that i still love him and can't let go. Other than exam stress, i realise i am actually friendless which made me quite depress. Even close friends i used to have seems to be different already...i have no complains about them, they are still my close gfs but we cant hang out and have fun like before. I guess it is just me not being able to handle these friendships well and insecurity sets in too...I really do love them but i don't know how much they feel towards me. *** is my longest gf and i would consider that we went through thick & thin and shes like my best friend but i find that i cant communicate as well to her as *******. I am not comparing but i would ask myself did i not try hard enough to keep a stronger bond with her?
P.s. I am not targetting at anyone but just trying to reflect & let it out!!!
I know my life is already much better than many people & i should learn how to treasure. But i really hope to have strength to carry on the journey of life with love~